So this is a post I have been meaning to write for a long time. I mention my beautiful and sexy wife often, but not often enough. It’s high time I gave her some much-deserved praise and explained how vital she has been in my spiritual journey.
When I first started questioning Mormonism, she was loving and supportive. She didn’t freak out (to me, at least). She was willing to talk about long-term ramifications of being a two-faith household should it come to that. She was willing to listen and to talk, and was willing to think and read and consider. Poke around the exmormon bloggerverse a bit and see how often you find people telling a story like that. Good luck.
Even if that was the whole story,it would be one worth telling over and over. But a quick browse through my blog archives should be plenty of evidence that that ain’t the whole story. I’ve struggled to figure out what I believe for years now, and she has supported me every step of the way. And not just in a hands-off “whatever you say, dear” way. She’s read about and carefully considered Buddhism when I was interested in Zen. We had long talks about Hinduism when I first read the Baghavad Gita. Even as she has cautiously explored the limits of her own spirituality (in a nonchalant pretending-shes-not-doing-it way), she has been willing to accommodate whatever harebrained religious idea I am entertaining at the moment.
I have a really hard time talking about genuine spiritual feelings, but she gives me a safe place where I can do it. She doesn’t judge; she doesn’t mock. She’s just there for me. When I finally told her about Dionysus and the gods, she encouraged me to explore this new spiritual world. She even suggested we get a good book of Greek mythology for the kids. When I experienced the presence of Aphrodite, she was excited for me, and thrilled about the new development. I can’t imagine that this is kind of thing is typical.
There’s more I could say–like about how the decision to pursue a relationship with her, ultimately resulting in our marriage involved what may have been one of the few genuine spiritual experiences in my life–but in the end, it all boils down to this one thing: she is my everything. She is the universe. When I love her, I feel like I am loving divinity. When I touch her, I feel like I am touching a goddess. I know what it feels like to be in the presence of deity because it’s llike what I feel like when I am in her presence.
I love katyjane.
Sailing to Byzantium 